A modern-day Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn run away from home and into a Colorado version of the opening to “Goodfellas” in “Cop Car” (2015). The best way to describe the movie would be “oddly fascinating.” Kevin Bacon’s Rocky Mountain copstache sure is. The first half of the movie almost seems like it ought to be nominated for Best Short Film. It’s like the end of “My Own Private Idaho,” except it’s not in Idaho. And it doesn’t suck. Then the fun starts. And by fun, I mean, “not fun.” At least not for Tom and Huck. Lesson: don’t steal.
I assume “R.I.P.D.” (2013) was filmed in 3-D, because that would explain all the unnecessary, distracting visual effects. Alas, I watched it on my 13-year-old, 22-inch, analog TV, so I only got 2-D: dopey and derivative. I can imagine the Hollywood lunch where it was green-lighted. “Guys, imagine this – ‘Men in Black’ meets ‘Ghostbusters’ with Jeff Bridges as Rooster Cogburn, plus Ryan Reynolds to get the teenage girl audience the first weekend! It’s a surefire hit!” This is another movie based on a comic book (pardon me – graphic novel). Unless you’re a 22-year-old boy (or 13-year-old girl), pass on it.
“A Few Good Men” (1992) is a pretty good courtroom drama made special by some unique flourishes: it takes place around a military court martial and features Demi Moore with her original face and Tom Cruise with his original brain. Best of all, it stars Jack Nicholson in a scenery-chewing performance as a hard-ass Marine colonel who gets to say awesome lines. He promises to piss in somebody’s dead skull – and you believe he would do it. Because every morning, he eats breakfast 300 yards from 4,000 Cubans that are trained to kill him. You need him on that wall.