Archives for posts with tag: David Caruso

A Vietnam-era PTSD victim drifts into a small town, the cops pull a “vet lives matter” on him and all hell breaks loose. Voila! Sylvester Stallone has a second franchise. “First Blood” (1982) is a landmark in macho film history, opening a door that guys like Chuck Norris and Steven Seagal walked through (after they closed it back shut so they could kick it down or blow it up). It’s so macho, David Caruso plays a wimpy guy. Hell, it’s so macho, testosterone-spouting Richard Crenna doesn’t need to show up in his Green Beret outfit until we’re 45 minutes in.

In 1984, Don Simpson and Jerry Bruckheimer made a movie with no helicopters. Not a single goddamn thing blows up. “Thief of Hearts” is an erotic thriller in which Steven Bauer robs a suburban couple’s house, then seduces the wife, all while looking extremely pretty. (The opposite of pretty? Bauer’s crime partner, a young David Caruso.) A couple more sex scenes and it would have been perfect for the Friday night 11:30 timeslot on Skinemax. But there aren’t. And it isn’t. It was the lowest-grossing film Simpson/Bruckheimer ever made. Their next effort was “Beverly Hills Cop.” The rest is history.