Archives for posts with tag: Bruce Willis

Halfway through “Hard Kill” (2020), a good-guy mercenary says, “it’s getting dark fast,” yet more than a dozen bad-guy mercenaries get killed and several banal speeches are given – and someone solves a Rubik’s Cube! – before the movie concludes. AND IT NEVER GETS DARK!!! This film also never gets interesting. Bad guys get their hands on a magic computer program so powerful it can save the world or end it. Corporate chieftain Bruce Willis hires good-guy mercenaries, who try to save the day while uttering moronic dialogue. I’m surprised Chuck Norris or Steven Seagal didn’t make this movie 30 years ago.

I saw the original “Death Wish.” Bruce Willis’ 2018 version is not “Death Wish.” It’s primarily a Bruce Willis movie. In it, he becomes a vigilante to avenge crimes against his family. That sounds a lot like “Death Wish,” but it’s not “Death Wish.” The 1974 version was weightier in every aspect. The crimes against Charles Bronson’s family were worse, his vengeance less precise and the moral argument more personal (although I do like the irony that Willis’s character is a trauma surgeon). But ultimately, Bruce Willis and his preternatural lack of gravitas is the problem with Bruce Willis’ “Death Wish.”

Ever seen a movie with so many halfway decent actors and so much half-ass dialogue and continuity errors that it just leaves you paralized? That’s right, paralized. Just like the “paralized” headline I saw in the Pittsburgh newspaper during “Striking Distance” (spellcheck hates me right now). This 1993 detective flick has a lineup that runs from Bruce Willis and Sarah Jessica Parker to Andre Braugher and Timothy Busfield. But infamous writer/director Rowdy Herrington also has people with two crutches and then no crutches and then one crutch, buttoned-then-unbuttoned shirts and a hilariously preposterous car chase. Except this isn’t a comedy.