The first sign of trouble was when the parents dropped their kid off to start college, and they’re dressed like it’s February (it wasn’t). And then there’s sporadic snow for the next several hijinks-filled days. And then the parents are drunk only sometimes when I was expecting “Arthur”-level intoxication. I mean, it’s called “Drunk Parents” (2019). And yet, like, everybody is in this movie (Alec Baldwin, Salma Hayek, Jim Gaffigan, Will Ferrell, Joe Manganiello, Ben Platt, etc.). It’s a half-assed train wreck that looks like it got slapped together over Presidents’ Day weekend, but at least it’s Salma Hayek’s half-ass.