I’m the worst movie reviewer in the world. I don’t have Hollywood connections. I don’t watch every hot movie the first weekend it’s in the theaters. I don’t care if Brangelina is having a four-way with Bennifer. I don’t watch movies with subtitles. I don’t care who the cinematographer was. I’m not a snob. I stop talking even if I have more to say. I watch a lot of rentals. I like most kinds of movies. They make me think of lots of off-topic things to talk about. Which is why I am the best movie reviewer in the world.

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